Maximum Gratitude, Minimal Stuff

Do you remember any Halloween costumes from your past?  When I was five, my mother dressed me as a cute witch (complete with a wig she made out of gray rug yarn) for the kindergarten costume parade.  I loved that wig, and played with it for a while afterwards.  I also remember being an "old lady" a few years later.  I wore my mother's robe and slippers, she put my hair in curlers and a hair net, and I perched my own old cat-eye glasses on the end of my nose. When my own daughter was about six, I made her a layered skirt using red and rose sateen bought on sale, tulle, and ribbons.  A plastic tiara completed her princess costume for Halloween that year.  The skirt went into the dress-up box, and became a regular feature of pretend play.  The next year, the skirt reappeared, and along with a colorful head scarf, a tambourine, and a lot of costume jewelry, transformed into a Bohemian costume. This year, my nearly ten-year-old grandson has plans to dress a...

All too often, we worry about producing The Best Holiday Ever, and while those online ideas for intricate themed décor, awe-inspiring parties, picture-perfect outfits, chef-inspired feasts, postcard-worthy travel, and starry-eyed children look gorgeous, the effect can be overwhelming. Social media has a way of amplifying everything, and even the most well-meant content can start feeling like a huge checklist that we're failing to complete.  Our modern Christmas isn't the remembrance of a humble birth or a relaxed day with those you love.  It's a huge performance that requires all of your energy (and money) for a month or more. And if you have kids or grandkids, the pressure to not only fulfill all of their (inflated) dreams, but to document every moment, is huge.  We've all heard this – the holidays are supposed to be magical . Now, I love a bit of Christmas sparkle and anticipation, and for many years I enjoyed the practice and preparations for holiday musical performa...

Imagine waking up every morning with feelings of peace and contentment, knowing that you have everything you need, and more.  Sounds like a dream, doesn't it? We live in a culture where success is measured by the size of our homes, the brand of our cars, and the labels on our clothing.  But what if true satisfaction is found somewhere else?  What if we're missing what matters when we give in to FOMO and try to keep up with the Joneses? Think for a moment about your favorite memories – the moments that have enriched you the most.  I'm willing to bet they've included the people, places, and pursuits you care about.  Laughing with friends, spending time in nature, or even enjoying a good book can add more to life than a big bank account. In fact, living with more than you need can be a major source of stress.  That includes clutter in your home, of course, but it can also mean worries about money, debt, and investments.  It can come from ever-growing wish...

There are many ways to declutter, and I'm not here to tell you there's only one right way.  But if you find yourself decluttering over and over just to keep on top of stuff, your method may be missing one important ingredient. I know this because when I first started reading about simple living, I made the same mistake.  You see, I'm quite good at paring down and removing things that are worn, outgrown, duplicated, or that I just don't want or use anymore.  I could do a little bit of that every week, save things up, and have a big garage sale a couple of times a year.  (What didn't sell, I'd donate.) The thing is, I'd always follow the garage sale with a shopping trip (or two).  Getting rid of unwanted things was a great way for me to refresh my home and my life.  It was the cue to go out and buy some new stuff for a new look.  My house was a revolving door of belongings.  Out with the old and in with the new! Pretty soon, I'd be decluttering a l...

I've lived most of my life in the 20th century.  I was born long before the internet.  I didn't grow up with screens, except a small black-and-white TV that got five channels.  I was subjected to real-life social stressors, but not the added, invasive stress of social media. Maybe that qualifies me to comment on what's changed.  After all, I remember things being different from what they are today. So overwhelming Today we've normalized overconsumption.  We listen to podcasts while we walk the dog, click and scroll on social media in the bathroom, tune in to a newscast while we cook, and watch Netflix while we eat. We allow almost no breathing space for our own thoughts, no openings to notice other people or the world around us.  It's as if we're terrified of stillness and quiet, and have to fill each moment with content and noise.  And then we complain about having no energy or motivation. Is this the road we're going to continue on?  This loud, ...

I'm not perfect.  There are many things about me that don't fit our society's idea of "excellent."  They don't even fit my own idea of "excellent." I'm not thin.  I'm not beautiful.  I can sing, but I'm not and never have been good enough to make a career of it.  When I was young, I thought I had to be a star, but I outgrew that attitude . I love my husband, but we don't have a fairy tale marriage, and there have always been things we didn't have in common.  I love my kids and my grandkids, but I've always needed time for myself.  I feel drained by too much socializing, and enjoy spending time alone, so I don't often go out. I plan to eat healthy, and do it a lot of the time, but I also like pizza and Mexican food and cookies, and I eat them too.  I'm a minimalist, but I also appreciate a certain level of comfort, and wouldn't be happy giving up everything. I'm committed to my faith, but I also have doubts and ...

Your version of "cluttered" may be different from mine, especially if you have toddlers or pets, or if you're dealing with a chronic illness or mobility issues.  But the same steps can get each of us from chaos to calm.  I promise you'll be satisfied, so let's get started! But before you lift a finger to declutter, ask these two questions: How do you want to feel in your home? What matters to you in your life? Maybe these questions seem obvious, but if you're overwhelmed by clutter, they may be questions you haven't considered for quite a while.  Take some time to think about what would make your home feel comfortable and supportive for your life, and what you need your spaces to do for you.  Then picture the people and/or activities you want to make a place for or be reminded of, and how that can happen in your home. Now you're ready to begin the decluttering steps. 5 types of clutter Most clutter belongs to one of these five categories: trash dishes ...

Know how to become a good singer?  Sing every day.  A good writer?  Write every day.  Good at anything ?  Do it every day.  Many of us want to improve our habits.  We hear a podcast, watch a TED talk, or meet someone who's doing something great, and we're inspired toward our own greatness.  We set a goal (usually a pretty big one) and get started, only to falter within a day, a few days, or a couple of weeks. The problem isn't finding inspiration or getting started.  And the goal may be worthwhile and pertinent to what we really care about.  But life intervenes.  We get busy, we get sick, we get interrupted, we get bored.  Somehow, our good intentions are overwhelmed, and we return to our own version of the status quo. So how do we break through and actually maintain a good habit long enough to achieve mastery and make it our default behavior? The secret isn't starting.  It's continuing – daily, step by step. The most val...