Maximum Gratitude, Minimal Stuff

Recently, the 20th anniversary of my father's death came and went.   Dad died unexpectedly one evening after my husband and I and our teenaged children had been visiting.  We drove the 70 miles home, happy about our plans to visit again the next week. My mom went into their bedroom to get Dad's bed and other stuff ready so she could help him settle for the night.  (He had ALS and was confined to a wheelchair.)  She went back out to the living room and found him.  The paramedics who came within minutes after she called 911 pronounced him dead.  Then she called me.  The phone was ringing as we walked in the door of our home. ALS is a horrible disease with no cure.  I had been mourning my father for more than two years already as he gradually lost his ability to walk, swallow, and even sit upright or turn his head.  But I wasn't prepared for him to die.  None of us were.  ALS is a slow death – and then it's sudden. Why we hang on ...

A lot of decluttering advice seems geared toward young people with plenty of energy and agility.   But if you move a little slower due to age, illness, infirmity, or heavy responsibilities (such as a couple of toddlers underfoot, or busy teenagers who don't yet have drivers' licenses), then the advice to clear out an entire room in a single decluttering marathon isn't realistic. I'm with you on this, because I have reached a certain age (ahem!) where a slower pace and less standing, bending, and lifting suits me just fine. Here are some practical tips and a simple decluttering method that lets you clear clutter in short, steady bursts without getting burned-out. Before you start Before we talk about the method, there's a decision you need to make: What will you do with the stuff you declutter? It's easier to declutter when you have a clear plan for how to dispose of your unwanted items.  Especially if you're low on energy, actually getting those things out o...

What is minimalism?  I like this definition from blogger Michael Ofei:  Minimalism is "the process of identifying what is essential in your life and having the courage to let go of the rest." It's a tool that helps you decide what's most important so you can make room and time to do more of what you care about.  Where minimalism starts, and what it does for you Minimalism starts where you do – at home.  After all, your home is an extension of who you are.  Your clothing, personal care items, what you cook and eat, how you entertain yourself, and your most intimate relationships are all centered in your home.  Most items in your home tell a story, particularly your books, collections, photos, artwork, and even things like your dining table and your favorite armchair. Your home is also the place where you have your worst experiences.  It's where arguments happen, bills come due, families fall apart, or where you receive phone calls about the death of a ...

We pile on "to-dos," but don't consider "stop doings."  We buy "new and improved" possessions, but don't remove old ones.  We create incentives for the good habits we want to cultivate, but don't get rid of obstacles to our new behaviors.  Every day, we neglect a basic way to make things better.  We fail to subtract. Why is this ?    It's true that subtraction can be hard to pull off, because there are biological, cultural, and economic forces that push us toward more.  But we have a choice.  We can learn to do better, and reap all the benefits of less stress, less busywork, and fewer things to divert us from what we really care about . Exploring less Wow.  Editing can really make a message pithy.  "We don't subtract.  Why?  Biological, cultural, and economic forces push us toward more.  But we have a choice.  We can do better, and reap all the benefits of less."  115 words pared down to 29.  I'm ...

Everyone's life is made up of repetitive events that seem unremarkable.   Driving to work, starting a load of laundry, sorting the mail, making dinner, brushing teeth.  These types of moments make the majority of life, but they're so routine that we don't think about them, and we don't bother to remember them or relate their details to anyone else.  They're too boring for that. Unfortunately, by letting all of these daily events remain mundane, we miss the vast majority of our time here on earth.  Instead, we give our attention to a few more-exciting events of the past, or to imagined future occasions.  We learn the habit of ignoring where we are and what we're doing in favor of thinking about what we need to do at work while we're in the shower, thinking about the weekend while we're at work, and thinking about what will happen next week when it's still Saturday afternoon. It might be September, but we're thinking about Halloween, or our Christm...

Happy Labor Day to my readers in the United States, and to all who labor to earn a living or to make life better for someone else!  I have certainly benefitted from the labors of many others during the course of my life. Inspired by the book Thanks a Thousand: A Gratitude Journey by A. J. Jacobs,* which goes into fascinating detail about the many people who have a role in making his morning coffee possible, I decided to write a post thanking a minimum of 100 people who have helped me, and continue to help me, as a minimalist, writer, and blogger.  Some of this help is or has been direct; some is tangential, but still essential. * As an Amazon Associate, I may earn a small commission at no extra charge to you if you purchase through my links. Once I started the list, I realized that there are more contributors than I originally thought.  Of course, many teachers have helped me, but so has Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos, and an Italian man named Pierluigi Zappacosta (see below). T...