Maximum Gratitude, Minimal Stuff

Shortly after my younger child turned two, I decided not to go back to work as I had originally planned, but to continue at home with my kids.  My older child was nearly five, so I bought a few primers and some Cuisenaire rods  and began teaching her at home.   This decision meant that our income wasn't going to nearly double, but that it would remain about the same (except for cost-of-living increases) for the foreseeable future. You see, I thought I had learned to live on one salary.  However, our credit card debt had already been slowly increasing, since every month we spent just a little more than my husband Jon earned. Voluntary simplicity – or not? I thought I was fully on board with the reality of our income, and was ready to live a minimalist life.  We didn't call it minimalism in the 1990s – it was called "voluntary simplicity" back then – but it shared a lot of ideals with today's concept of minimalism: Mindful consumption.   Buy only what yo...

Do you have children or grandchildren?  Are you already thinking about which toys you want to buy them for Christmas?  Are they already thinking about what they want to ask for? Here's an interesting experiment.  What happens when they only have one toy to play with ?  Even more intriguing – what happens when the only things they have to play with aren't toys ? German kindergartens removed all toys, and guess what happened?  At first, the children were adrift, confused, and bored.  They quarreled with each other.  By the second day, they were cooperating to make up their own games, imagining that a row of chairs was a train, a box was a boat, and a blanket over a table made a cave. When I was a kid, my brother and I would play for hours under the round picnic table on our patio, pretending we were in a space ship flying to the moon.  My sister and I would seat our dolls on our bed and pretend we were driving our camper van on a marvelous vacation...

Does your phone help you relax?  A lot of people think so.  We turn to our phones for news, entertainment, connection, and relaxation.  All good things.  But there's evidence that excessive phone use makes us more impatient, more irritable, and less present for the real people and events in our lives. What qualifies as "excessive" use?  Well, studies show that Americans access their phones up to 200 times every day.  That's once every five minutes or so, every hour that we're awake.  Do you think that's excessive? Maybe every time you pick it up there's something that requires your action and input.  A text, email, notification, or something that indicates you're sought-after, productive, and useful.  Answering these siren calls gives you dopamine hits that you might not always get in the course of a normal day – dopamine hits that are addictive and make you crave even more. Dealing with compromised impulse control Do you ever pay attention ...

How many of you have started Christmas shopping?  When I went into Target today (for laundry detergent, TP, and other staples), I was greeted by Christmas décor throughout the store, even though Halloween is still in the future (not to mention Thanksgiving). But according to retailers, the next season is already here. This trick, which makes shopping seem necessary and urgent, has become normal to us, even if we might feel momentary annoyance about it.  But the constant rush toward the next shopping season has affected us in more ways than one.  It's now typical for most of us to push through every event, hurrying toward the next, spending all of our energy (and time and money) in lavish preparation, and putting almost no attention on the occasion itself because we're already thinking ahead to the next thing. We're always pushing, plowing through errands, appointments, emails, and other to-dos.  Our habit of always looking ahead to what's next, even before we've fin...

Decluttering is such a hot topic that new ideas for how to do it crop up on a regular basis.  If you've struggled to declutter your wardrobe, and especially if washing, drying, folding, and hanging your clothes is a job you find boring and time-consuming, you'll want to give this method a try. Wendy Rose Gould, a writer for apartmenttherapy.com , describes what I've dubbed the No Laundry Method, calling it "brilliant" and "clarifying."  It's also simple, and it removes the emotion of saying goodbye to old, previously-loved garments. How to do it The No Laundry Method is so straightforward it barely requires instructions.  As the name implies, you simply stop doing laundry for a week or two (you should still wash sheets, towels, and underwear).  Live your life, behave normally, and wear garments out of your closet and dresser as usual.  Toss them in the hamper when dirty. Over the course of several days, you'll have worn all of your go-to favorite...

I've lived in my current home for 13 years.   It's an apartment, so even though it's well-maintained, I can't upgrade or redesign anything – that's up to the owners.  (Of course, they also bear the cost!)  Last year, they redid some of the landscaping.  Over the years, we've had a new washer, dryer, and dishwasher when they were needed.  They also replaced our kitchen flooring.  It's not bad, but it's also not what I would have chosen. It would be easy to look around and be bored with my space.  I go through periods of time when I get frustrated with beige carpet and creamy white walls.  I'd love to have a slightly bigger patio.  (Ours is tiny.)  I'd really like to upgrade the pedestal sink in the bathroom and change the fluorescent light fixture and countertops in the kitchen. Are you in that situation?  Do you wish for a bigger or fancier home?  Are you longing for the day when you can buy your own?  Are you sick an...