Why a Smaller Home Might Offer More Happiness than a Mansion

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In our culture, bigger is always better.  "Go big or go home," am I right?  If a little is good, more must be desirable.  This applies to our meals, our vehicles, our closets, and to the screens we stream The Diplomat on.


And for many, a big house is the ultimate dream.  TV, movies, and even family and friends send the message that a big, beautiful house means a big, beautiful life.


Is a mansion really the path to comfort and happiness, or have we just accepted this idea without question?  What if we dared to think differently?  Is it possible that a smaller space has unexpected benefits?


big houses near San Gabriel Mountains, CA



Let's get practical.


It's easy to see that owning a larger home doesn't just mean more square footage.  A big house means a bigger mortgage, higher property taxes and insurance costs, larger utility bills, and more maintenance.  There are usually more toilets to clean and bigger lawns to mow.  And it takes more furniture to fill it, which probably means more tchotchkes too.  Even if you're not the one doing all of the dusting and vacuuming, hiring someone to do it for you is yet another expense.


Month after month, you'll pour more time, energy, and money into a big house, leaving you less for other pursuits.  And to afford all of this, you may have a longer commute or work more hours, leaving less time for relationships and leisure, and keeping you away from the big house you're sacrificing so much for.





There's more.


A bigger house doesn't just lead to bigger bills and less time.  A larger home can create a sense of isolation as family members spread across multiple rooms.  You may watch The Diplomat in one room while your spouse watches Bridgerton in another, and never the twain shall meet.  Meanwhile, one child plays hours of video games all alone, and another gets sucked into social media – clicking, liking, and reposting without ever speaking to or seeing anyone else.


Did you grow up eating meals with family members, playing board games, and watching Star Trek: TNG and MacGyver together?  Did you know your sister's boyfriend and watch your brother work on his science project?  Today's families in huge houses may not share any of those connection points.  I wonder what will remain of these "relationships" when a few decades have passed.







The benefits of going smaller


When we set our sights on a bigger house, we might not even consider the benefits of a smaller home.

  • A smaller home probably means lower costs, which leaves more freedom in our budgets.
  • A smaller home requires less time for cleaning and maintenance, opening the door for other pursuits.
  • A smaller home encourages more family connection, bringing everyone together instead of spreading them out.
  • A smaller home inspires us to curate our possessions, allowing us to discover the most useful and meaningful items.

Instead of measuring our success by square footage, we could opt for the rewards of balanced budgets, closer relationships, and time for experiences that enrich our lives, such as volunteering, travel, and personal growth.


"House poor" might not just refer to a situation where so much of your income is going toward housing expenses that you can barely afford anything else.  It could also mean that your house is robbing you of time and energy for other areas of life.  It could mean that all of your plans and attention revolve around maintaining and improving your house (I've lived like that).  Your house, or your driving desire to upgrade to something bigger, could be stealing the focus and creativity you need to live a rich, well-rounded life.


Choosing a smaller house can be surprisingly rewarding.  With a smaller, easier-to-manage space, you may feel more peace and contentment.  Instead of a showplace, you can enjoy rooms that are cozy and supportive.  Don't you want your home to serve you, rather than the other way around?





You be the judge.


In the end, what's important is that you live for what matters to you, not for what society tells you will make you happy.  Maybe the joy you're looking for isn't in a bigger space, but in the freedom to decide what's right for you.


A bigger house may be what others aspire to, but living with less space doesn't mean settling for less.  Sometimes less space makes more room for focus and creativity, comfort and connection.  And isn't that what makes a house a home?







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