How Your Home Calms You - Or Stresses You Out

You know how relaxed you feel when you come in your door after a long day at work and an awful commute?  Or maybe you get the feeling when you arrive after a trip.  No matter how much fun you had, how nice your hotel, or how perfect the weather, it just feels good to come home.

Maybe you enjoy the familiar scent.  (We like to suffuse the air with scents of cedar, moss, and vanilla.)  Perhaps you remove your shoes, open the embroidered curtains in your living room to let in the light, and take your favorite seat on the couch.*

The way my home feels isn't an accident.  It's the result of many small, intentional choices I've made so my space not only looks attractive, but also fills me with peace.

Most of us think about home design in terms of aesthetics.  Does this art go with the couch?  Do the throw pillows match?  Is this flooring on trend?  But the details of our homes impact our senses, and these cues make us feel either soothed or agitated.  The visual noise, lighting, sounds, scents, textures – all send signals to our brains and bodies.  If we want a space that supports our well-being, we need to design it that way.

* This blog is supported by readers, not ads.  If you buy through my links, I may earn a small commission.

Designing for the senses

Think about five categories:  what you see, hear, smell, touch, and experience.  (Yes, I know taste is the fifth sense.  Bear with me.)

1.  What you see

We think that every wall needs artwork, every room needs a pop of color, and every surface needs a decorative item.  But what if we don't have to follow those "rules" all the time?

Our brains are constantly processing visual information.  Too much of it (too many objects, too many patterns, too much stuff competing for attention), and your nervous system stays on alert.  That's just one reason why decluttering your home can make you happier.

Maybe "alert" is what you want in your creative space or your dining room.  But you might want a more restful feel in your living room, and it's definitely what you need in your bedroom.

• Consider soft, analogous colors (neighboring hues on the color wheel), or a mix of neutrals.

• Try one oversized piece of artwork instead of many small items.

• Use closed storage.

• Avoid harsh, overhead lighting.  Instead, choose lamps with warm-toned LED bulbs.

• Clear flat surfaces and decorate with one item (or none) such as a plant/vase, framed photo, or a small stack of books.  Corral small items on a tray so they "read" as one item.

• Reduce the number of patterns to one or two.  In my bedroom, a leaf pattern is repeated in the quilting of my solid-color bedspread, the embroidery on my curtains, and the design of picture frames and a mirror.

2.  What you hear

Which sounds make you happiest?  I love birdsong and breeze-blown windchimes, so I keep a window open except in the coldest weather.  For relaxation or concentration, I listen to classical music, but for fun I turn to music from the 1970s and 80s.  Maybe you like the sound of trickling water, or what you really want is silence!

The soundscape of your home may be less welcoming if it's filled with TV ads, video game explosions, or road noise.  Rugs, curtains, and upholstered furniture can reduce the "echo effect" of an empty room.

3.  What you smell

Scent is the fastest way to affect how you feel.  That's because what we smell bypasses the rational part of our brains and goes straight to the limbic system, which processes emotion and memory.  So the scent of lavender can evoke your trip to France, or brownies in the oven can transport you to Grandma's house.

A vase of eucalyptus branches reminds me of long-ago family picnics on the beach near Santa Cruz, and I love cleaning with a fresh, crisp, lemony scent.  How would you introduce your favorite scents into your home?

4.  What you touch

Invite yourself to relax and slow down with comfortable textures.  Soft cotton sheets.  A chunky knit throw.  A rug that warms your bare feet.  These aren't just aesthetic choices – they make your home feel welcoming and safe.

5.  What you experience

Most of what we experience during the day is noisy, intrusive, and filled with messages that make us feel we're lacking something (so of course we have to buy it!).  But think about what happens when you listen to the ocean or walk in the woods.  Studies show that these experiences actually change the frequency of our brain waves and put us in a more meditative state.

Plants are an easy way to bring nature home, so consider having one in every room.  You can stick with easy-care low-light favorites like pothos, snake plant, or peace lily, or choose something larger like a ficus tree if you have a well-lit corner.  In addition to their beauty and serenity, plants help detoxify indoor air.

Natural materials add an earthy palette, increase texture and interest, and make your décor timeless.  Wood, stone, clay, metals like copper and iron, woven materials like rattan, seagrass, or willow, and fabrics like cotton, linen, hemp, and wool are beautiful and durable.

Of course, you'll want to include items that recall your own special experiences:  favorite photos, travel souvenirs, collected pieces, and handmade art.  Just remember to pick and choose the best (or rotate different pieces in and out with the seasons) so you can focus on and enjoy your belongings.

Personal and peaceful

When you design your home according to your senses, it becomes very personal.  Instead of following the trends, follow your own instincts and preferences, making small shifts that support the feelings you want to have when you're at home.

When I turn on a lamp, sit with a soft toss pillow at my back, and inhale the scent of my Earl Grey tea, my whole body relaxes.  These aren't complicated or expensive details, they're just intentional ones.

Is there a small change you've made (or would like to make) that increases your peace at home?

If you enjoyed this post, I know you'll love my book, Minimalist Hygge, part of my Minimalist Basics series.  Hygge may have originated in Denmark, but it's an idea that deserves to spread throughout the world.  It's a perfect fit with minimalism, and I think you'll love the insights shared in this book.

In spite of what you might have heard about it, the concept of hygge is about much more than being warm and cozy as snow falls outside.  It's a mindset that celebrates the art of slowing down and savoring the everyday pleasures of life.  A hyggelig mindset can help you see the beauty that's right in front of you today, and Minimalist Hygge can be your guide.