When You Want It NOW: How to Slow Down for More Peace

By
Are you always in a hurry?


Microwave ovens, 24-hour shopping and one-day delivery, TV streaming, and air travel have trained us to expect that our desires can be satisfied any time, any place, and pronto.  Some of us never stop acquiring new treats.  When we're rewarded so quickly every time we push a button, we just keep pushing that button.


in a hurry



A world addicted to speed


And what about things that take a little longer?  A home-cooked meal, an auto trip, a handwritten note, a conversation?  We become "too busy" for those things, and let takeout or frozen meals, speeding, and likes and emojis do that work for us.


A world addicted to speed isn't very pleasant.  It makes us pushy, anxious, and short-tempered.  Our bodies and nervous systems are constantly on high alert, and don't handle the too-frequent doses of "fight or flight" hormones very well.  And lasting relationships built on care and trust don't flourish on terse texts and rushed exchanges.


I'm not exempt from all of this.  I have a habit of impatience, and I need to deal with that.  So how can I practice something different?





9 steps to more patience and calm


1.  Recognize impatience.

I've started to notice when my habit of hurrying makes me push, or when I feel anxious and stressed because something isn't happening immediately.  


Let's be honest – our habit of wanting immediate results is a bit childish.  If I want to be less selfish, I have to pay attention to my attitude and actions.


2.  Deliberately choose to slow down.

This is a choice I have to make multiple times per day.  


3.  Remove nonessentials.

I aspire to be less busy.  I don't try to fill every minute of every day, but leave space between each task and appointment for the inevitable snags that arise, or simply for small moments of rest or contemplation.  My days unfold more smoothly when I don't over-schedule (and I actually get more done).


4.  Turn off advertising.

Ads are everywhere and relentless, but I want to stop being sold to.  I block ads as much as possible, and I don't add needless shopping to my schedule.



5.  Control news intake.

I decided to stop being shocked and titillated.  I check headlines once early and once later in the day, flagging articles I want to read when I have a break for reading.  I don't needlessly split my attention by having the news or a talk show on in the background.  After all, "breaking news" is usually what's been repeated over and over (and over) for the last several hours.  I don't need to listen in or worry about "keeping up."


6.  Keep a journal.

Even a sentence or two about what made me smile, what I think is worth remembering, what went right, or what went wrong and what I learned from it makes each day valuable and distinct.


7.  Notice your surroundings.

I especially pay attention to any enjoyable details along the way.


8.  Count your blessings.

It sounds trite, but when I notice and give thanks for what I already have, I feel so much more satisfaction than when I focus on what I don't have, or on what I wish for.


9.  Redefine happiness.

I don't need to own a lot of things or experience it "all" in order to be happy.  Watching the sun rise through clouds this morning while listening to one of my favorite pieces of music actually brought tears of joy to my eyes.  I could have been in a big hurry, missed the moment, and been poorer because of it.





The added benefit of a lightly slower, less busy lifestyle is not only less stress, but more focus.  We can all find a greater feeling of accomplishment and peace when we're able to give our best to the tasks and activities we choose to do.


Resist the fast-forward life.




Updated May 2023

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

52 Minimalist Hobbies to Benefit and Enrich Your Life

By
Image
Everyone benefits from a hobby or two.  Hobbies reduce stress by letting you spend time on something you enjoy provide scope for creativity and imagination make you more knowledgeable and interesting help you develop patience and skills improve your sense of accomplishment and self-esteem promote mindfulness and concentration can create a social life and let you bond with others who share your interests can allow you to stay active and physically healthy I've known people with entire rooms dedicated to their hobby – studios for painting and pottery, sewing rooms, woodworking sheds, and basements filled with wine-making apparatus or a model train setup. But even if you live in a small space, like my husband and I do, or you want to pursue hobbies that require less equipment and expense, you're in luck.  Many hobbies take a lot of space and tools, but many do not, and you can probably find one of those that you'll enjoy. There are some tricks to making a hobby work in a small...
Read more

12 Easy, Daily Chores to Keep a Tidy Minimalist Home

By
Image
Good habits are more than the actions your mama nagged you about (wash your hands, turn off the lights, say please and thank you).  They're a foundation for the actions we need to do that let us take care of business without having to plan or decide each and every step.  For example: If you develop the habit of taking vitamins with a big glass of water each morning, you get all the benefits without having to debate the action. If you deal with mail efficiently each evening, you streamline your to-do list without burying a few important items in a mountain of junk. These useful habits benefit us, unlike bad habits such as smoking or oversleeping.  So why not develop some good habits to help us keep our homes tidy and clutter-free?  Reduce decision fatigue by making small, daily actions a routine for you and your family. Huge decluttering projects or deep cleaning sessions have their place, but for daily ease, try these quick and simple chores to make a profound differ...
Read more

Why You Should Make "Less is More" Your Mantra for Life

By
Image
Maybe you've heard the saying popularized by architect Mies van der Rohe in 1947:  "Less is more." It's an oxymoron – a phrase that seems to contradict itself.  Others include "old news," "open secret," "unbiased opinion," and "awfully good."  Or the lament, "Parting is such sweet sorrow." What does "less is more" mean?  It's wonderfully open-ended.  Answers to that are as varied as the people who reply.  Consider: Less anxiety, more peace. Less debt, more savings. Less busywork, more substance. Less clutter, more space. Less comparison, more contentment. Less sugar, more vegetables. Voluntary simplicity Back in the 1990s, a fair number of Americans realized that the continual quest for more and better was stressing them out and keeping them from creating lives of purpose.  After the consumerist binge of the yuppie-era 80s, some started wondering if the big house, flashy car, exotic vacation, and Rolex we...
Read more

Help - My Partner's Clutter is Driving Me Crazy!

By
Image
You love your partner.  But you don't love her stuff.  (And she doesn't love your nagging about her stuff.) It's a common issue for couples.  In fact, some surveys have found that nearly half of all couples argue about clutter.  A few even have the argument every day. If you're in this situation, decluttering by itself isn't going to add to your peace.  In fact, it might create more tension in your household.  It's important to find ways to come together in this area. Why clutter is an issue One reason there's so much friction about this topic is that, for many of us, possessions are part of our identity.  Your husband's tee shirt may look to you like it's ready to become a dust rag, but to him it might be a reminder of the time he saw his favorite band perform.  Your attempt to downgrade it might feel like a personal attack.  It's not so much about the physical item as it is about the emotion that's attached to it. How can this be resolved?...
Read more

Finding the Good in Hard Times

By
Image
As a child, the name "Good Friday" always confused me.  How is it good if it commemorates the day Jesus died?  I understood that Easter was the joyful celebration of Jesus' resurrection, the triumph of good over evil, and the hope of eternal life in relationship with God.  But how is the suffering of that Friday good ? I had to go through some suffering of my own to learn its potential. Whether or not you're a Christian, you're going to go through hard times at some point.  The world isn't perfect, and struggles and disappointments are real.  A strong and hopeful perspective is one you'll want to cultivate. 15 lessons we might learn from hard times 1.  We might learn that we're stronger than we know, and that we can survive things we never thought we could endure.   2.  We can learn to let the past go, wake up tomorrow, and try again. 3.  We learn not to waste energy on things that aren't important in the long run.  We get better at...
Read more