Maximum Gratitude, Minimal Stuff

Calmness, for some, might be an inborn personality trait, but it can also be a demeanor you learn.  Certain habits can help maintain your equilibrium even when life is bustling. Scandinavians in general seem to be good at this.  The Danes practice hygge (pronounced hoo-gah), and it can protect your energy and add comfort to every day.  Try these six behaviors to boost your mood and bring balance to your activities. 6 actions for peace and simplicity 1.  Manage your light. If you live where winter is long and gray (like it was when I lived in Denver, Colorado), you can't just wait for sunshine and warm weather in order to feel human.  You have to treat light like medicine. You know how inviting a warmly-lit café can look on a dark afternoon?  You can create this attractive look at home.  Add dimmer switches to overhead lights, and use a mix of lamps to create pools of light, especially at eye level.  Keep curtains and shutters open as long as you ...

Tomorrow is Black Friday, the biggest shopping day in the U.S. and other countries around the world.  In 2025, more shopping is expected to happen online than in stores, but for many people, Black Friday shopping is still a traditional, social experience.  Even though retailers now offer Black Friday sales throughout the month of November and beyond, over 76 million Americans visited stores in person on the day after Thanksgiving last year, and a similar number are expected to brave the crowds and the lines this year too. Of course, the marketers that design Black Friday events and promotions are hoping to convince us that our lives (or our holiday gift recipients) will be happier and better if we give them our money in exchange for their products.  They don't just sell products – they sell feelings, aspirations, and solutions to problems we don't even know we have. "Expect more, pay less."  "Save money, live better."  "Because you're worth it....

Our culture has the wrong idea about happiness.  It seems to say that happiness comes from success – financial, professional, etc.  Achieving more money, more possessions, more travel, a promotion, an athletic record, or even a high GPA or SAT score is supposed to make us happy and satisfied.  Yet more often, meeting one goal seems to spawn two or three more, and we never stop chasing the next high. There's been a lot of research on happiness, especially in the past 20 to 30 years, and what we've learned is that reaching the typical milestones of success doesn't make us happy, at least not for long.  The new house or car, the big raise, even getting into the college of our dreams doesn't make much difference in our overall level of happiness, and can sometimes make us less happy – for example, if the extra costs of a larger house or fancier vehicle outweigh the enjoyment they give, if a promotion makes our work days longer and more stressful, or if the hyper-competi...

For me, Christmas means music, candles, the Christmas Eve service at church, and time with family playing board games or watching the old black and white Miracle on 34th Street .  For you, Christmas might mean your annual ski trip, dressing up to attend the Nutcracker ballet, eating cookies and drinking eggnog, or hanging Christmas lights and decorating the tree.  You want to create the memories and carry on the traditions that mean most to you, but you don't want to feel stressed or anxious while you do it.  This time of year is meant to be joyful, not pressured.  So how can you make things simpler, but keep what matters? 10 ideas for a relaxed and cozy holiday 1.  Begin with deciding what Christmas means to you. Give yourself a focus, and everything will be simpler.  Other things can go by the wayside as long as you accomplish what matters most to you. 2.  Choose a mantra. Make your holiday about one main idea, and remind yourself of it frequently....

Have you heard of the Five Love Languages ?  It's a concept that's been around for more than 30 years, ever since pastor and marriage counselor Gary Chapman wrote a book about it. I'm not going to debunk the idea, since many people have found that it helps them understand and relate to their loved ones.  I do think it's important to note that all of us give and receive love in multiple ways.  Maybe the important takeaway from the Five Love Languages concept is that love is expressed by spending time and paying attention, saying kind and uplifting words, sharing physical closeness, performing acts of service, and – sometimes – giving appropriate gifts. Love is not a transaction. What I have a problem with is the assertion that, for some people, giving and receiving gifts is the main or only way they can express love or feel loved.  I think that idea is ridiculous, and demonstrably untrue.  How many of us have known someone whose parents always showered them with...

We've all been there.  You're rushed, busy, and tired after working all day.  But company's coming, and you're desperate to fix the piles of clutter, unfinished projects, and dusty surfaces.  How do you create a sense of calm – right now – so you can relax and welcome guests? Here are five simple jobs that can soothe your racing mind and tame your messy house. 1.  Start with quick wins. These tasks take just minutes, but have a high impact on the look of your space, and let you feel motivated by what you've accomplished. Collect all trash, then take it out. Collect mail and papers into a basket for later sorting. Load the dishwasher and wipe down kitchen countertops. Hang up scattered re-wearable clothing, and place dirty items in a laundry hamper. Gather potions and grooming tools into a basket for later sorting/decluttering.  Wipe down the bathroom mirror and counter, leaving it clear except for hand soap and a clean towel . Use a natural all-purpose cleaner...